In a Relationship with a Screen

I wrote this two years ago and it still holds true:

I wake up every day and I walk my dog. We get coffee. She gets a biscuit. She carries the biscuit home in her mouth to eat on my bedroom floor.

I lay back in bed. I read a book and I sip on my coffee. I make a simple breakfast of cottage cheese and blueberries. I aimlessly look for jobs on the Internet. I have a 15 minute panic attack about money. I worry if I will be lonely, single, and have a mediocre life. I look for more jobs. I think about what it would be like if I was just a waitress and pursued writing and comedy full time like some of my actor friends.

I remember my debilitating writer’s block. I remember that I watch too much TV. I remember that I have forgotten how to be alone with my thoughts and without social media.

I remember I have to catch up on my Snapchat, Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. I look at social media again on a cycle. Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter. Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter. Two hours of social media I come up for air. I look at my dog. She looks at me. She has slept through this all. Her only worry is if I will abandon her forever. I envy her. I envy her a lot. I remember my aspirations and dreams.

I remember my addiction to a screen. I start the cycle again.